To All the Single Women living on the Fence

Most of my 20s were spent in doubt about relationships, marriage, and if I'm honest a man's capacity to bring me some form of happiness. I lived on the fence, one foot on the single forever by choice side, and marriage wouldn't be so terrible side. At that time in my life, none of my friends were on the fence, most if not all were dating happily or recovering from break-up but fully ready to get back out there. I on the other hand never quite knew what I really wanted, and I wish I knew more women who felt the same way.

I think there is a generalization that all girls in their 20s are willing and ready to run down the aisle, and that little to no doubt exist about the "happily ever after" path in life. Well if you are reading this and you've gone through doubt or are currently going through it, you are not alone.

Doubt doesn't have to be a bad sign, or a one-way ticket to spinsterville. Doubt can sometimes be your brain or heart telling you to slow down and think this through. I can honestly say that the doubts I've experienced led me to where i am today. Fully confident and hopeful for the future, and comfortable with my desire to be a wife one day. In my 20s i knew i was no where near ready for marriage and had no desire to be married at that time. It wasn't until the age of 31 and time dedicate in therapy, did I begin the journey of find out what i wanted. 2.5 years of therapy later I feel ready for the next stage in life. Going through this almost 15-year process, I've learned that age just doesn't equate to readiness or maturity to handle what we think we should already have.

So to the women living on the fence, unsure of what they want, its okay and your okay. Dont rush the process, take your time, you have time ( despite what your family and friends might think). God has a way of making our path clear, and meeting us right where we are in our journey.